I’m 25, and after years on dating apps, I’ve learned that profiles rarely match reality. David’s profile said he was 30, charming and confident, and he picked a fancy restaurant for our first date. He insisted on paying upfront, which should have been my first warning.
The date itself was fine—polite, if a little like an interview. When I casually mentioned that I usually don’t date significantly older men, he smiled, but his tone shifted. He paid the check with exaggerated confidence, and we parted politely.
Later that night, an unknown number called. It was David’s mother. She claimed my comment had “hurt his feelings” and demanded I reimburse half the dinner. That’s when I found out David wasn’t 30—he was 38.
I sent the money, leaving a note: “Buy yourself the most expensive pacifier you can find.” Then I blocked them both and deleted the app.
Lesson learned: if a grown man needs his mother to chase women for money over hurt feelings, he’s not looking for a partner—he’s looking for a babysitter.